With football season now upon us, I will be trying something new where I give my quick reactions to the results of each week. So here we go, let’s dive into all of the matchups.
Starting with the Pats vs the Steelers, my not so bold take is that the Patriots are going to win the Superbowl this year. With, or without AB. Some podcasters are going as far as saying that the Pats will finish the season undefeated. I’m not sure if I can make that much of an overreaction just yet, but as long as the Pats don’t see Eli in the Superbowl, I think they should be fine.
For the 49ers vs Bucs, Jameis Winston most certainly did not “eat that W.” In fact, it surprises me that Winston still has a starting job. That man has had more picks than a forgetful guitarist. On the flip side, Jimmy G looked decent in his return. Unfortunately he’s no longer on the Patriots.
I didn’t watch the Bengals vs Seahawks game, but I have a good reason for that: I didn’t want to watch the Bengals vs Seahawks game. I’m not sure how much longer Andy Dalton will be in the league, so maybe I should cherish him. Also, John Ross is pretty fast. And D.K. Metcalf’s arms are bigger than Pete Carrol’s head. Maybe now it makes sense for them to throw on the one yard line.
The Rams didn’t look like the defending NFC Champs, but they had just enough to pull out the victory vs Christian “White Lightning” McCaffrey and the Panthers. Not sure if White Lightning is his actual nickname, but man is he electric. Many sports blogs have predicted a poor season for the Panthers, but I think they might actually sniff the playoffs.
The Ravens/Dolphins game taught me a couple things. First, the Dolphins are not that good. Just from watching one game, I know that this year’s Fantasy strategy should consist of picking up players each week who are facing the Dolphins. Also, Lamar Jackson can throw the ball. And I know the Dolphins are terrible, but I still think the young man showed that he can be a versatile QB. I’m sure Joe Flacco is pissed.
For the Titans vs Browns, I can’t tell if the Titans offense is actually decent, or if the Brown’s are still THAT bad defensively. Baker didn’t look great, but a large part of that has to do with their O-line. Baker can feel as Dangerous as he wants, but he’s not going to cause a lot of destruction if he’s getting sacked every play. We’ll see what Freddie Kitchens cooks up in week 2.
For the Jags/Chiefs game, I knew that Mahomes would remind us of how great he is. And the Ketchup-lover obviously did just that. And how bout Sammy Watkins? The former Clemson Tiger looked like a whole different player. For the Jags, it hurt to see Nick Foles go down with an injury in week 1. I really want him to prove that the Eagles made the wrong choice. Because we all know the Eagles made the wrong choice.
The Packers vs Bears was a perfect replication of the Superbowl. Very boring, some good defense, but mostly just sloppy play. I think that’s just how Goodell wanted it for the first game of the season. He’s great at upsetting us fans. As far as great QB talk goes, I know the Bears defense is pretty good, but should we really call Aaron Rodgers the GOAT? Either way, we all know certainly well who isn’t the GOAT. And that’ Mitch Trubisky. Mitch relies on his defense more than Peyton did during the 2015–2016 season.
The Vikings ran all over the Falcons. And Matty Ice looked like Natty Ice out there. Absolute garbage. The former Superbowl attendee might never recover from the 28–3 memes. He had two picks like a double screen. The Vikings on the other hand, have themselves a running back. Dalvin Cook has come a long way from fumbling twice against my Ducks in the Rose Bowl. Unlike Jameis, Dalvin has actually improved since that 2015 game. The Vikings now just need to limit Kirk Cousins to 10 pass attempts a game and they’ll be Superbowl bound.
The Jets/Bills game is another matchup that I didn’t watch. Once again, because I didn’t want to watch it. These two teams are in the same division as the Patriots. I could see Belichick going rogue and pregaming his Jets/Bills matchups with a bowl of pretzels.
Redskins vs Eagles was a close one. Case Keenum put up better numbers than Carson Wentz. And those are the facts. The Eagles certainly have a dangerous receiver trio, and it’s always fun to see a player have a revenge game. DeSean had DeSecondary lost many times throughout the game. It’s unfortunate that the Eagles don’t have Foles because they would probably win the whole thing.
Chargers vs Colts was a fun one. And I actually was in attendance for this game. The Bolts had way too many chances to put this game away, but Luck was on their side in overtime. And Adam Vinatieri might have to hang it up after that performance. If Andrew can do it, Adam can do it. Like the Steelers did last year, the Chargers have pretty effortlessly found a running back to take their star’s place. Choosing to sit out might be the second worst decision an athlete named Melvin has made this summer. (Reference to Marvin Bagley getting stomped by Dame in a rap battle).
It’s about that time of the year where the media overreacts to a Cowboy’s regular season performance. Them Boyz were ranked 6th in this week’s power rankings, which is pretty wild, considering they will just choke in the playoffs again. The Giants made Dak look like a God. And I guess all it takes is one game for Jerry to break out the checkbook. I’m hoping Saquon can get out of New York in the next few years. Those thunder thighs won’t last long if he remains a Giant.
This picture says it all about the Lions vs Cardinals matchup. I can’t believe we had a tie in week one. Kyler looked pretty good in the second half, but it wasn’t enough for the Cards to complete the comeback. With hard work, I could see the Cardinals over exceeding expectations this year and winning four games. And the Lions…well the Lions will always be terrible. Matt Stafford probably has Megatron on speed dial right now. All in all, this game was irrelevant because neither of these teams are relevant.
The Monday night games got off to a good start with the Texans and Saints. DeAndre Hopkins body slammed the hell out of some Texans corner, but unfortunately tackling someone in football is a penalty. The Watson to Hopkins combo looked as great as always. And for the Saints, Drew Brees’ pregame speech was just enough to propel them to a victory. I don’t think Wil Lutz is fazed by Carli Lloyd.
And last and close to least, the Raiders vs Broncos was another battle of mediocrity. But props to the Raiders for not letting the AB drama get to them. Derek Carr actually looked alright. And the Raiders run game added some pop as well. I had no idea Joe Flacco was the Broncos QB, but that really sucks for them.
If you have made it this far, I appreciate you reading through my quick reactions for Week 1. I will be bringing these to you each week, or at least until the Patriots make every other team forfeit.